JavaScript and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race

The beach is essentially shit of fish, and we humans love it, we humans love shit

– Me, circa 2021

(That’s why JS is popular)

OR: Manmade virus infecting the world. JavaScript is a programming language often used on websites. To create dynamic content on client end. Some dudes thought that extracting the V8 (chromium javascript interpreter) and making it a executable file to run javascript outside the browser was a good idea and now we’re doomed.

JavaScript is not only stupid (javascript returns true when) true + true === 2 Which means that true is literally #define true 1. null is object for some reason…

At the end that doesn’t matters. Because it’s a useless fact to be honest. It only shows how bad designed the shit is. But the pain starts when you actually use that programming language.

Developers idiocy

First of all the language is slow as fuck. And websites are BLOATED of JavaScript nowadays. Adding USELESS function i’d never like to use, or functions I already disabled on my browser. Such as smooth scrolling. I hate smooth scrolling. But some websites force me to use it because JavaScript.

Not to mention the fucking thing runs like shit because developers don’t really know how to write this abyss programming language. For example, In a good browser (pale moon), Javascript runs like shit (IT’S A FEATURE). No I mean, literally, Tweetdeck runs 100 times better than fucking regular twitter.com.

And remember, if you use a good browser (pale moon), which has slow javascript interpretation, haha! good luck browsing the web with javascript enabled! it will be fucking impossible

Idiocy examples


<true + true === 2
>true
<true == "1"
>true
<false == 0
>true
<false == "0"
>true

<'0' == 0
>true

<'\t' == 0
>true
<[] == 0
>true
<'\t' == []
>false

<false == undefined
>false
>false == null
<false

<null == undefined
>true

// I specially like this one

<[]+{}
>"[object Object]"
<{}+[]
>0

Disabling JavaScript

Unless you only use 1.0 websites. Disabling javascript will broke your internet experience, but will make it way faster. just install noscript and have fun with your sane browser.

NodeJS

Node is what happens when you extract the JavaScript interpreter from chromium and put it on the desktop. This allows the user to execute .js files on the desktop without a browser. Which is stupid. A web programming language shouldn’t be on desktop. Just on the web. But thanks to this great idea we’ve now worse things

(Node isn’t even a JavaScript implementation. It is just the V8 engine outside the Chromium browser. Meaning that node is just a part of chromium with marketing)

Idiotic programmers

As JS standard library wasn’t enough pain, you can create modules, as stated before, JS programmers should not be called programmer as a sign of respect to other programmers, for example, the is-even node module:

>200k weekly downloads

And if you look the is-even source code, you see this:

is-even is just a call to the is-odd library, okay

And then, if you go to the module site you can see how it has 400K weekly downloads.

And if you go to their GitHub site. You have the honor to see this:

Syntax

The syntax was written by a gorilla, it uses camelCase, (I don’t like it, but well, i can live with it).

for example, in JS you do document.getElementById("foobar"); I guess this is ok, but like I said, this was written by a monkey, becuase then we have functions: XMLHttpRequest <– What the hell? Why is XML capitalized, but Http isn’t? A good language, let’s say, C, would have done it like this: xml_http_request; (which is saner) or XML_http_request() if you use the weird OpenSSL functions names lol

Electron

Electron is what happens when you hire web developers but you gotta make the program aviable for the desktop. The problem is that JavaScript can’t do graphics (as far as I know, there’s no X11 library for JavaScript, thankfully) So what do they do to use GUIs on JavaScript? Make every program a mini-chromium browser! So every program that’s running electron is just chromium browser. Which is truly stupid. And a lazy way to do programming.

Here’s what is needed to run a program (Written in a compiled language) in GNU/Linux:

And this is what is needed to run a program written in electron: